Tourney jokes!

Talk about any Kick Off Tournament here.

Moderator: Moderators

User avatar
VKafiris
6000+ Poster!
6000+ Poster!
Posts: 6847
Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2001 12:00 am
Location: Athens, Greece
Contact:

Postby VKafiris » Fri Oct 12, 2001 8:20 am

On the trail of the big cat

By the Newsquest Team

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dartford, February 7th: Wildlife experts have dismissed claims a wild puma could be stalking the countryside in Dartford.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A motorist became the second person in seven months to see what they suspected was a fawn-coloured big cat roaming between Bean and Crayford.
Christine and Raymond Pearson were driving to the dentist on the Bean Road (B255) just south of the A2 when the animal jumped off the bank of the road straight in front of their car and went into the field on the other side of the road.

Christine Pearson, 54, from Fawkham, said: It had a flat coat which was a very dark fawn colour, like a mountain lion or a puma. It was about 2ft high and 3ft long and looked quite well fed.

But nature conservationists are less than convinced by the sighting.

Derek Gow, Project Manager at the Wild Wood Discovery Park in Herne Bay said: If there was a puma living in the local country side there would be distinct signs, such as traces of their scent.

Pete Smith, wildlife campaigner for Kent Wild Life Trust said: Pumas are more likely to run a mile from a person. In their natural habitat they keep themselves to themselves.
User avatar
alkis21
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 15011
Joined: Wed Jul 04, 2001 12:00 am
Location: Athens, Greece
Contact:

Postby alkis21 » Sun Oct 14, 2001 9:43 pm

Vasilis, whatever you're on, I want some of it! I hear your birthplace has plenty, too.. <IMG SRC="/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_smile.gif">
User avatar
VKafiris
6000+ Poster!
6000+ Poster!
Posts: 6847
Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2001 12:00 am
Location: Athens, Greece
Contact:

Postby VKafiris » Mon Oct 15, 2001 8:14 am

Hehehehe!!! I hope you like the story!
User avatar
MJB
3000+ poster!
3000+ poster!
Posts: 3121
Joined: Mon Jul 02, 2001 12:00 am
Location: Tredworth - Gloucester UK

Postby MJB » Fri Oct 19, 2001 11:09 am

Subject: EU Commission

This is a harmless joke our German friends should read in particular...enjoy...


The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".
In the first year "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replased with the "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of the double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also al wil agre that the horrible mes of the silent "e" in the language is disgrasful and it should go away.
In the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from words containing "ou"
and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yer ve vil hav a rali sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor
trobl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
E DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU !!!


_________________
Martin - Official Joystick Breaker for KOA Tournament 2001

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: MJB on 2001-10-19 13:10 ]</font>
User avatar
VKafiris
6000+ Poster!
6000+ Poster!
Posts: 6847
Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2001 12:00 am
Location: Athens, Greece
Contact:

Postby VKafiris » Fri Oct 19, 2001 11:25 am

Zat vas on of ze most fany post I'v ever red!
rotfl!!!
Vassilis - Official KOA Black Sheep
2016 World Cup XVI (Milan) - Silver Cup Winner
Image
User avatar
alkis21
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 15011
Joined: Wed Jul 04, 2001 12:00 am
Location: Athens, Greece
Contact:

Postby alkis21 » Sat Oct 20, 2001 10:30 pm

Oldie but goodie.. this must be one of the first e-mail jokes I received during my early internet days (in 1995, back when the dinosaurs were walking on Earth).

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest